S.O.S ALIEME

Every year the Catholic Church in Nigeria celebrates Fathers’ Day in honour of St Joseph. The patron saint of Catholic Men. There are some thoughts I wish to share today about fatherhood which comes with its pains and some admonitions to all fathers. As a father, I am full of experience and as I do wear the shoes of Fatherhood, I know how it hurts and I know the right words to use to encourage Fathers worldwide. Being a Father exposes one to the stark realities of its challenges. We have seen fathers who, burdened by their own struggles, flew from their familial responsibilities, leaving behind fractured homes which contributes significantly to the dysfunctional society we have today. 

Fathers’ Day celebration has become one important event that has gradually gained popularity among the Catholic community. It is a day the Church in her wisdom has set aside to celebrate fathers just like mothers celebrate Mothers’ day. The celebration is in honour of St. Joseph, the husband of Mary and foster father of our Lord Jesus Christ (Mat.1:16). Beyond the attractions of the celebration, it is important to understand the mind of the Church and the significance of the celebration. Though it might be considered very little, nevertheless, the scripture has a rich account of St. Joseph in his role as the husband of Mary, and foster father of Jesus. As the husband of Mary, St. Joseph was that chaste spouse God appointed to protect Mary and Jesus. Though a humble and lowly man, who was just a carpenter and not of any known wealth, St. Joseph received the huge responsibility. We notice his utter humility and dignity in accepting Mary even in the confusion of a pregnancy from the Holy Spirit. He was also to protect Jesus. This we see through his role when Herod wanted to destroy the boy Jesus.

We can also see from his actions in the scripture that St. Joseph was a compassionate man, and obedient to the will of God. He also loved Mary and Jesus and protected and provided for them. As a man who accepted such an exalted responsibility from God, while yet remaining a lowly carpenter, St. Joseph also teaches us humility in service, regardless of who one is. Through St. Joseph, Jesus learned perseverance because the scripture attests that Jesus followed Joseph and Mary, and was obedient to them. St. Joseph is the Patron Saint of Catholic fathers and his life of obedience, chastity, availability, sacrifice and humility is a source of inspiration and a classical lesson in fatherhood. St. Joseph was not found wanting in his duties and responsibilities as the earthly father of Jesus Christ. He persevered in his commitment despite the challenges while listening to the voice of God. These qualities are the reasons the Catholic Men Organization of Nigeria (CMON) under the authority of the Catholic Bishops’ Conference of Nigeria (CBCN), adopted the feast of St. Joseph the Worker for the celebration of Fathers’ Day in the Catholic faith. This celebration is held every first Sunday in May of every year.

The responsible father lives in the ever consciousness that he is the head and that as the head he bears the burden of the family, especially when things may not seem to go as expected in the family. This is what St. Joseph did in times of confusion in his family. Responsibility for a father goes as far as bearing the consequences of the actions of the wife and children, even when they are not living out the full life expected of them. The responsible father does not go about laying blames or getting frustrated, he rather listens to God in the sure hope that his love as the father both for his wife and children is expected to conquer the power of evil and sin in the family. The responsible father also lives in the faith of a brighter and better tomorrow. Through him the entire family gets the inspiration to surmount all challenges facing the family. It is on account of all that the father represents in the family that Fathers’ Day has become a day to extol fathers who are available for their families and who have made sacrifices to prioritize the unity and welfare of their families as well as make meaningful contributions to the growth of the Church and the communities.

We celebrate fathers who are struggling to navigate through the challenges of fatherhood in a period of economic uncertainties, social injustice, bad governance, insecurity and unfortunate craze for money and pleasure which are threats to family cohesion and national development. It is also a period of reflection and a time for fathers to reawaken their consciousness to their responsibilities.

Apparently, the responsibilities of fathers have become more daunting in a society that revels in mundane and transient things. A period that is becoming difficult for fathers to chastise their children, a period our young ones are drifting from the practice of Christianity to the practice of neo paganism and the craze for quick money, a period of religious apathy, drug abuse, moral decadence, etc, with its dire consequences on the families, Church and society.

Fathers’ Day is also a day, mothers, children and indeed all Catholics honour and pay tribute to their husbands, fathers or father figures in their lives. It is important to note that when we celebrate fathers on Fathers’ Day, we celebrate each and every man: fathers, brothers, husbands, men consecrated to God in virginity. We celebrate perfect men and weak men. We celebrate all men as they have come forth from the heart of God. We also pray for them that God will continue to support them with his grace in their onerous tasks as fathers.

However, this year’s Fathers’ Day should encourage fathers not to be overwhelmed by these challenges and pressures but be motivated by the life of St. Joseph their Patron Saint as pilgrims of hope in a bleeding society. St. Paul in his letter to the Ephesians 6:4, wrote, “Fathers, do not provoke your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord”. On the flip side, Proverbs 3:11-12 wrotes, “My son, do not despise the Lord’s discipline, and do not resent his rebuke, because the Lord disciplines those he loves, as a father the son he delights in”. This is a call for children not only to listen to their fathers but to live a life that will make fathers know that they have not worked in vain, for all fathers also want to see children who will take care of them in their old age. This is the recipe for a peaceful and united home which translates to a peaceful Church and a peaceful society.

As we celebrate the Fathers’ Day, I congratulate all Catholic fathers who are genuine heroes in their families and worthy ambassadors of the Church and the society. Take your flowers dear fathers and enjoy your day. Let us heed the call to be beacons of strength, compassion, and integrity. Let us strive to impart wisdom, sow seeds of kindness, and leave an indelible mark on the life of all those we care for and under our charge. For in the legacy we leave behind, lies the true measure of our lives, not in the length of our days, but in the depth of our impact. Catholic Fathers should emulate Christ's relationship with his Church. Because that is where fathers can find a blueprint for true paternal devotion. Christ is the head of his Church, he loves the Church and amidst the shortcomings of this Church, He is always with them. Fathers need to emulate the selfless love of Christ, serving as the steadfast pillars of their families. We live in a world often consumed by material pursuits, fathers are reminded that while wealth may offer comfort, it should never eclipse the sacred bonds of family. Let us not succumb to the allure of success at the expense of precious moments with loved ones, especially during the formative years of our children’s lives because there is certain training and discipline that only the father can give to his children. The harsh realities of mortality remind us that life is fragile, and as men, we are not immune to it but rather, we are highly susceptible to death more than women. If you keep heading out to hunt for food, may God provide security for you in all your endeavours.

So, to all fathers, mentors, and guardians, may this Fathers’ Day serve as a testament to your unwavering dedication, and your boundless love for your families. You are loved and honoured.

God Bless the Fathers, God Bless Nigeria!!!